Resources.

I learned a lot in my first year of motherhood.

Here are some resources that helped me learn how to raise my baby (sleep, breastfeeding, solids, first flight) and navigate other major transitions (parenting with my partner and my own postpartum adjustment). I hope something here helps you on your journey.

Mental Health & PMHDs.

mother holding her newborn baby

1 in 5 new moms (and 1 in 10 dads) suffer from a perinatal mood and health disorder (PMHD) or symptoms of anxiety and depression. Yet the majority are untreated or go undiagnosed.

The more we talk about this, the less stigma there will be.

  • There are a range of professionals that can give you the emotional and social support you need — doulas, peer support groups, therapists, psychiatrist, intensive outpatient programs, and more.

    Visit Postpartum Support International’s directory of qualified perinatal mental health providers to find resources in your area.

    You can also call or text Postpartum Support International’s helpline at 1.800.944.4773.

  • Joining a peer support group was one of the best things I did postpartum. It supported my mental health and made me feel less alone. I met with a facilitator and other new moms for 8 weeks to discuss topics ranging from postpartum adjustment, relationships, infant feeding, and sleep.

    • Amma Parenting (Minnesota-based, paid): Offers classes for new moms and new dads.

    • Postpartum Support International offers free virtual peer support groups for new moms, new dads, and many other specialized groups.

    • Pregnancy & Postpartum Support Minnesota (Minnesota-based, free) offers 2 types of direct support to new moms: 1) Peer mentors, moms with lived experience that provide 1:1 support for 6 weeks and 2) Doula services for limited families in need.

  • FACEBOOK GROUP (closed): Postpartum Support International offers a community that provides peer support and information to help manage pregnancy and postpartum stress.

  • PODCAST: Motherly interview with Katherine May on the power of rest and retreat in difficult times (33 min)

    PODCAST: NPR News with Angela Davis - How peer support groups are bolstering mental health (47 min)

    PODCAST: Pregnancy & Postpartum Support Minnesota Baby Brain interview with Michael O’Neil - New Dads Group at Amma Parenting (45 min)

    DOCUMENTARY: Stutz (1hr 36min) - Conversations between actor Jonah Hill and his therapist Phil Stutz, including actionable tools for everyone to think and feel better.

  • The postpartum journey is a marathon not a sprint. Here are some daily mantras that got me through it:

    • Being a good mother does not mean being a perfect mother. Good moms do the best they can, when they can.

    • Good mothers get overwhelmed, exhausted, and feel anxious. When things feel overwhelming, it can help to take things one day, one hour, and one minute at a time.

    • Give yourself grace. Be gentle with and kind to yourself like you would to other new moms.

    • Both you and your baby are so new to this relationship. Your baby is figuring things out too and you are learning together.

    • There really isn’t any way to prepare for this adjustment. Motherhood is hard. Remember that you are built to do hard things.

    • Taking care of your baby requires taking care of yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

Matrascence & postpartum adjustment.

matrascence and postpartum adjustment

Becoming a mother, also known as ‘matrascence’, is a major life transition of physical, physiological, and emotional changes. Treating it like a process can help manage expectations and allow you to embrace this new identity.

Working with a life coach helped me navigate this transition—towards becoming the mom and individual I wanted to be.

Postpartum planning.

new parents holding a sonogram picture

A postpartum plan is a basic framework for navigating the initial months after birth with your partner. This may include parental leave, postpartum recovery, childcare, chores, and other priorities. Discussing preferences, expectations, and roles with your partner can help ease the transition.

In hindsight, I wish I spent more time having these conversations!

Relationships.

holding hands and relationships

Two out of three couples report a decline in relationship satisfaction after having a baby. Taking preventative steps with your partner can help build the foundation and skills to navigate challenges later.

With help from a couples counselor, my husband and I developed greater understanding and empathy for each other as we evolved into our new roles as parents.

Baby: Sleep.

sleeping baby

Sleep deprivation was my #1 concern with having a baby. I knew it couldn’t be avoided but welcomed any advice I could get to maximize naps and bedtime sleep. Our daughter started sleeping through the night when she was 11 weeks old.

    1. One well-rested parent is better than two parents without sleep. My husband and I are both better people when we’re well-rested. There was no point in both of us being sleep deprived. When my husband returned to work, he slept in a separate room and I covered night shifts. On the weekends he took the first bottle so I could sleep in.

    2. Develop a sleep routine (and stick with it). Babies crave routine and consistency.

    3. Learn about the universal baby cues: Most babies use similar cues to indicate if they’re tired, hungry, or disengaged. Understanding these were a game changer and made things a bit more predictable for us and the baby.

    4. Be prepared for sleep regressions: As soon as you feel like you’ve stabilized your baby’s nap or sleep schedule, a regression hits. Before baby’s 1st birthday, sleep regressions typically occur at 6 weeks, 3-4 months, 6 months, 8-10 months, and 12 months. They’re frustrating but it helps to understand these timelines (and that they’re temporary)

  • If you have the resources, you can consider hiring a night nurse, doula, or sleep specialists.

    We did not, but had great success with the Snoo, a smart bassinet that soothed our baby back to sleep after middle-of-the night feeds.

    We leaned on Snoo sleep experts and our pediatrician’s nurse line for any/all questions related to sleep.

  • BOOKS

    Suzy Giordano, 12 hours of sleep by 12 weeks

    ARTICLES

    Happiest Baby, The 5 S’s for soothing baby

    Babywise, 5-6am ‘night’ wakings

    Happiest Baby, Baby grunting in sleep and other sleep sounds, explaned

  • The Oprah Show (9 min), One woman unlocks the secret language of babies

    Transition to Parenthood (21 min), Name that cue: Understanding what your newborn is saying

  • Note: The following products are not sponsored and are all items I used during my own experience.

    Bassinet: Snoo

    Carriers: Ergobaby Omni mesh carrier (newborns and younger infants) and Ergobaby 360 (older infants and toddlers)

    For soothing: Bouncing on an Exercise ball, pacifiers (Philips, MAM), white noise (Hatch)

    For naps: Lounger (Dok a Tot)

    Clothing: Swaddles (Halo, SwaddleMe), sleep sack (Woolino), PJs (Magnetic Me modal footie, Carters 2-way zip onesie)

Baby: Breastfeeding.

breastfeeding

Breastfeeding was my biggest stressor postpartum. I breastfed for the bonding and immunity benefits and am grateful I was able to do it for 9 months. But it still came with a lot of challenges — the daily pressure of producing enough milk, the hours spent nursing and pumping, and clogged milk ducts.

    1. Give yourself time to learn this new skill: Breastfeeding and pumping are brand new skills for both you and the baby (the latch, a new pumping device, and more) and may not come easily. Give yourself space to learn it. In hindsight, we were grateful we didn’t have visitors at the hospital when our daughter was born, so I could fully focus on learning this skill with the help of lactation specialists.

    2. Be efficient with nursing and pumping: Breastfeeding and pumping are incredibly time consuming. But taking advantage of this time to do things you enjoy can make the time go faster (bonding with baby, watching TV, meditating). Use a haakaa to catch excess milk to build a supply. Here are some time-saving pumping hacks for working moms.

    3. Get your partner involved: I pumped extra milk for at least 1 bottle a day. This allowed my husband to participate in feeding and my baby to get used to the bottle.

    4. Use insurance to cover the cost of your breast pump: New breast pumps can cost $100-$300. Call your insurance company to learn more about this benefit.

    5. Read the user manual for your pump: I learned this the hard way. As your baby grows, you’ll need to increase the vacuum strength on your pump. Re-reading the manual would have saved me hours of pumping.

    6. Pack a manual breast pump while traveling: On separate trips, I had issues with the back flow protector. These accessories are not easy to find on the road, so bring a manual pump or extra pump accessories.

    7. Remember that breastfeeding is a privilege and hard work: Breastfeeding is not for everyone and it was undoubtedly the toughest part of my postpartum experience. But, it is truly amazing to have the ability to produce milk that keeps your tiny human alive. When it got tough, it helped to count up the total number of hours a days spent on breastfeeding and pumping — it really is a massive effort.

  • I had incredible support from lactation specialists at our birthing center and through follow-up visits with our pediatrician’s team. Doulas are also an option for providing postpartum support.

  • Choosing and using breast pumps:

    ARTICLE: Pumping Mamas, Spectra pump settings: Pro tips for the most milk

    ARTICLE: Babylist: Best breast pumps of 2023

    VIDEO (4 min): 4MDMedical, Troubleshooting Spectra S1 & S2 pump

    Boosting your milk supply:

    ARTICLE: MomLovesBest, How to pump more breastmilk

    VIDEO (17 min): Bridget Taylor, 7 Tips for increasing milk supply

    Breastfeeding positions:

    VIDEO (3 min): Breastfeeding Success, Laid back breastfeeding

    VIDEO (4 min): Texas Department of State Health Services, Breastfeeding positions

  • TOOLS

    BabyConnect app - I used this app to log all nursing and pumping sessions. This allowed me to track progress over time and identify opportunities to be more efficient with my time.

    EDUCATION

    Kellymom.com - created by a board certified lactation consultant that provides evidence-based information on breastfeeding.

    Amma Parenting (Minnesota-based, paid): Offers classes about childbirth, parenting, breastfeeding and more to help new parents during the pregnancy and postpartum period.

    Feeding Guide: An all-inclusive guid on feeding options, expectation setting and navigating complex conversations. The guide was developed by Bobbie, Willow and SimpliFed.

  • Note: The following products are not sponsored and are all items I found useful based on my own experience.

    Breast Pump

    • Electric (Spectra S1) - the main difference between S1 and S2 is that the S1 has a rechargeable battery, allowing you to pump anywhere. In hindsight, I would have invested more in a wearable pump for the extra convenience.

    • Manual (Haakaa) - used to catch the natural letdown while breastfeeding which allows you to build excess milk supply for bottles. The mini size is great for traveling.

    Supplies & Storage

    • Storage bags (Medela) - I prefer Medela over Lansinoh because they stand up better when pouring milk into the bag.

    • Sterilization bags (Medela) - I’d sterilize bottles, pacifiers, and pump supplies in these bags. They are easy to use and can be used 20 times before being replaced.

    • Cooler bag (J.L. Childress) and ice pack (Ace small) - supplies I used to pack bottles for day care and travel.

    • Burp cloths (Green Sprouts) - our baby spit up often so we bought many sets to have around the house.

    • Bottle drying rack (Boon) and bottle brush (OXO) - we bought two sets of these, one for the kitchen and the second for the bathroom in the nursery (which saved time during middle-of-the night feeds).

    Bottles

    • Bottle box (Babylist) - not sure what bottle to use? Sample a few before committing to one.

    • Bottles (Como Tomo) - these worked best for my baby and come in 2 sizes for younger and older infants.

    For mama

    • Water bottle (Owala) - I love this bottle because it’s clear and has a wide spout, making it easy to drink more water and track how much you’re consuming throughout the day.

    • Pumping bra (Simple Wishes) - this bra is structured and very supportive, allowing you to keep your hands free to do everything else that needs to get done!

    • Nursing bra - I liked the Bandeau top because it was easy to slip on/off without having to fuss around with nursing bra clips. For more support, I used Bravado bras.

    • Cover ups (Muslin Swaddle) - I tried a lot of specialty cover ups for nursing/pumping and found that tying the corners of a muslin blanket (around my neck and waist) worked best.

    • Nipple cream (Earth Mama)

    • Nursing pads (Lansinoh)

  • Here are some of my favorite recipes and drinks for boosting milk supply. *Recipes coming soon!

    RECIPE: Oatmeal

    RECIPE: Lactation cookies

    DRINKS: Water, Mothers Milk, beer (yes, beer)

Baby: Solids.

baby in a highchair

    1. Learn about the division of responsibility in feeding: This was a game-changer for me. From Ellyn Satter’s Institute, this promotes the following roles: the parent is responsible for what a child eats and the child is responsible for how much they actually eat (and everything else). Once I understood this, meal times became way less stressful for everyone. I was able to just trust the process and that my baby was competent in getting the nutrition she needed.

    2. Watch videos of babies gagging: This sounds weird but watching videos of babies eating and understanding the difference between gagging and choking reduced my fear of starting the solids journey.

    3. Meal plan: Planning the menu once a week eliminates the mental load required to plan daily. Creating weekly menus based on what we have at home (prioritizing ingredients about to expire) and choosing produce that’s in season can help with making fresher and cheaper meals.

    4. Buy an extra freezer: If you have the space, buy an extra freezer. I double most recipes to freeze for future meals. This saves a lot of time cooking during busier weeks.

    5. Only shop once a week: This will save you money and time. I also take baby with me so she can participate in the process and understand the ingredients that go into her meals.

    6. Introduce potential allergens early and often: Consult with your pediatrician to ensure safe feeding, but there is a lot of evidence behind this. Peanut, soy, dairy, and eggs were the first potential allergens we introduced when our baby started solids. Pro tip: The first time you introduce potential allergens, have a bottle of bendryl on hand and time it during the week (easier to get into the pediatrician or urgent care, if needed)

  • FACEBOOK GROUP: Trader Joe’s meals for busy mom

    FACEBOOK GROUP: Easy slow cooker recipes.

    FACEBOOK GROUP: Easy air fryer recipes.

    INFLUENCER: Jordan Page, Fun cheap or free. Tips for budgeting, meal planning, kitchen organization, and cooking for a large family. Check out her videos here.

    INFLUENCER: Katie Ferraro, Fortified family. Specializes in baby led weaning, includes recipes and webinars for introducing this approach.

    INFLUENCER: Mike Greenfield of Pro Home Cooks. Focusing on using fresh, tasty ingredients to make quick meals.

    INFLUENCER: Allison Roman. I love her recipes that feature fresh, clean, and tasty flavors. She also has a great sense of humor so her videos are very engaging.

  • ARTICLE: Ellyn Satter’s Division of Responsibility in Feeding.

    BOOK: Ellyn Satter, Secrets of Feeding a Healthy Family

    BOOK: Wendy Jo Peterson, Born to eat: Whole, healthy foods from baby’s first bite

  • Division of Responsibility

    PODCAST: Good Inside (episode #97, 42 min): Clean plate club

    PODCAST: Janet Landsbury Respectful Parenting (37 min), Concerned about your child’s eating habits? Ellyn Satter has the answers.

    Picky eaters

    VIDEO: Katie Kimball, Picky eating isn’t about food

    VIDEO: Shine with Plants, How to get your toddler to eat a lot of veggies

    VIDEO: MyRecipes Mom’s 13 tips and tricks for picky eaters.

    Meal planning

    VIDEO: Jordan Page. Family of 8 for only $25/week.

  • WEBINAR (1 hour, free): Baby-led weaning workshopby Katie Ferraro

    APP: SolidStarts (library of first foods for babies, including nutritional information, ways to serve, and more)

    APP: AnyList (for creating lists of food items for your next grocery trip)

  • Note: The following products are not sponsored and are all items I found useful based on my own experience.

    Meal planning: Magnetic dry erase whiteboard (for displaying weekly meal plan), Souper cubes (freezer meals), Rubbermaid containers (leftovers)

    Cooking: Air fryer, Egg Dash cooker, Slow cooker

    High chair: IKEA Antilop high chair and foot rest

    For drinking: Cups for infants (Lalo and First Years sippy cup), and toddlers (First Years straw cup and Camelbak Eddy water bottle)

    For eating: Fresh fruit feeder (Munchkin), Bib (BabyBjorn), plate (Mushie), spoon and fork for infants (Nooli), spoon and fork for toddlers (Munchkin)

    Cleanup: Microfiber wash cloths (Kyaboo), splat mat (Wowomun)

  • Here are some of my daughter’s favorite meals. I’ve selected recipes that are nutrient-dense, freezer-friendly, and that the whole family can enjoy.

    *Recipes coming soon.

    Breakfast

    Apple & carrot muffins

    Banana & blueberry almond pancakes

    Banana spinach smoothie muffins

    Overnight oats

    Lunch/Dinner

    Beef lasagna

    Black bean fritters with cilantro

    Butternut squash soup

    Pork, egg, & veggie fried rice

    Roasted cauliflower, carrot, and sweet potato quinoa salad with fresh herbs

    Slowcooker vegetable and bean soup

    Spinach pesto pasta

    Turkey & beef bean chili

    White bean stew with turmeric

    Snacks

    Roasted red pepper and lemon hummus

We introduced solids at 6 months following baby-led weaning and the division of responsibility in feeding. The transition from exclusive breastfeeding to solids was scary, stressful, messy, and time-consuming. There is a lot that goes into ensuring your little one has access to nutritious meals every day.

Baby: First flight.

mom holding baby on a flight

We took 4 flights with baby before her 1st birthday — and still learn something new every time. I was incredibly overwhelmed and anxious before that first flight, but we survived (and you will too!)

Not sure where to start?

There are so many great resources of support out there, but it can be overwhelming to find what you need at the right time.

While I don’t offer direct, professional support to new moms, I love helping other new moms feel less alone and find the support they need.

If you’d like advice on where to start and/or someone to talk to, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.

Blog Posts.

Blog
Navigating support: healing after pregnancy and infant loss

Losing a baby is a heartbreaking experience, but healing is possible. Find support, connect with others, and honor your baby's memory on this journey of grief and healing.

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Pregnancy loss: reducing stigma and how sharing can heal

Pregnancy loss affects many families, yet stigma often leads to silence and isolation. Talking about it is key to healing and finding support.

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Radical acceptance turned my postpartum anxiety into empowerment

 What I learned in therapy that changed my life

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8 nourishing recipes for new moms

Recommendations from a nine-time marathoner and mom of two

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Empowering new moms during minority mental health awareness month

Addressing the mental health crisis: support and resources for new moms, especially women of color

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Potty training: A post-mortem

What went wrong, how we recovered, and what we learned

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Honoring all emotions on mother’s day

Let’s embrace both the joys and challenges that have allowed us to grow into the mothers we are today

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Empowering mothers on maternal mental health day

Here are 6 free resources I share with new moms looking for support

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These are the 7 books I’d gift to new moms

To empower them to tackle the anxiety and stress that comes with motherhood.

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What I learned analyzing data from my first year postpartum

Parenting is a full-time job. We need systemic change to support new moms and parents through this major life transition.

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Activating a key life force: Nutrition for moms and babies 

Prioritizing nutrition can be one of the most impactful investments we make in shaping our life force and overall well-being. 

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What I learned volunteering for Postpartum Support International

Everyone needs to know about it. Moms are struggling and there’s a shortage of qualified therapists available.

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5 ways marathon training helped prepare me for motherhood

Becoming a mom is hard work that requires intense mental and physical strength. Here’s what I learned from running marathons that helped ease the transition.

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Transitioning to motherhood: It doesn’t have to be this hard

Becoming a mom is hard. New moms don’t get the support they need and we deserve more from our health system, employers, and government.

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Forget the baby registry: Here are 11 things to get new moms

Gifts for new moms that will help her take care of herself (and baby)

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Tips for baby’s first flight

Preparing for baby’s first flight can be so stressful and overwhelming. Here’s what I learned after 4 flights.

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